Faith and depression

Faith and depression is a topic I scheduled for today. And I know I won't be able to give it justice in the next few minutes before bed so I'm going to post a video from John Piper, and then post my response. I hope to revisit this topic later as I have MUCH to say about it being a dysthymic and a Christian.

I've greatly struggled with relating my depression to others, and I know that's true for anyone with depression, but I've found I think there is an additional difficulty when relating it to other Christians as so many focus on their joy in the Lord. And I certainly DO have my joy in the Lord. However, this sadly doesn't change what is chemically going on in my body both because of brain chemistry and chronic illness.



The following is my response to the video.
As someone who has dysthymia I feel the need to speak up in response here. Dysthymia is a very real and hard to diagnose depressive illness. It often goes undiagnosed and untreated because those around the sufferer don't see the depth of it all like they would with major depression. It still needs medical treatment and the help of a psychiatrist, both verbally and medically.
I mention all of this specifically because sometimes "Eeyore personality" is exactly the way to describe dysthymia.

Another viewer commented my post with affirmation saying;
"I second that.
Doesn't matter how much I pray, worship, or meditate on the bible, the dysthymia won't go away. It's like my mind is frozen. "

I do want to further clarify that I admire Pastor Piper for speaking on this matter. It is true that there are those who are unnecessarily medicated. I also know that my Christian faith has & continues to be the center of my treatment. My comment is to raise awareness about dysthymia through clarification; it is hard to diagnose & generalities can discredit the need for medicated treatment.

I then agreed with the person who responded to my post and said, 'I think you're right, it very much is like my mind is frozen (w/o treatment) too.'

Concern regarding "Seeker Churches".

The following is a video on a topic I am very concerned about. It's something I've seen as a growing concern in 'Christianity' today. Churches that want so desperately to attract seekers and teach almost exclusively on the gifts and blessings of salvation that they forget to even address why man needs salvation or what a growing faith looks like.

"The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians, who acknowledge Jesus with their lips and walk out the door, and deny Him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable." - Brennan Manning. I site that quote because I see this following from these churches that are not leading their flock with bible centered teaching. By making sermons full of stories and psychology, with hints of verses promising prosperity followers are lead to have a very narrow view. It doesn't instruct how one is to live a life honoring God and as a result many followers claim to be Christian, but when you dive deeper into matters of faith, don't really have any answers other than that they know they're saved because they believe. While this is true it should also mean that one is called out, made different, and led to lead a new life, free of their past self with Christ as their example. When the rest of the world doesn't see any difference in a Christian, that, I believe, is where this over simplification is falling short, and actually only encourages unbelievers in their disbelief.

I hope this topic is something that all bible believing Christians, especially leaders, take to heart and act upon. This is a concern because it sets (new) followers up to be misguided and disappointed when life gets hard. It ushers in guilt to those who are suffering leaving some with a crisis of faith, wondering why they are still so afflicted if God is so good and kind and will just make like perfect. The truth I've learned in my faith walk isn't that God will take away my burdens (in this life), but that He will give me strength to get through them, and that through it others might see Christ in me. Only when I become a new Heavenly creation will my failing body and burdens of this world be fully released from me. This is where I cling to 2 Corinthians 4:7-18, and I see this in other parts of scripture as well. Please take the time to watch this video. It can explain more clearly what I am getting at.



Revelation 3:14-22

And to the angel of the church in Laodicea write: 'The words of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the beginning of God’s creation.

"'I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth. For you say, I am rich, I have prospered, and I need nothing, not realizing that you are wretched, pitiable, poor, blind, and naked. I counsel you to buy from me gold refined by fire, so that you may be rich, and white garments so that you may clothe yourself and the shame of your nakedness may not be seen, and salve to anoint your eyes, so that you may see. Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me. The one who conquers, I will grant him to sit with me on my throne, as I also conquered and sat down with my Father on his throne. He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.'"

I must be INSANE!

I must be insane! There are only 27 days 'till Christmas and I just wrote up another swap I'm hosting. At least these new ones are set for after the new year.

Click the angel image to see about the swap.

Great quote

I came across this from HEvencense's blog. I thought it was such a great quote that I wanted to post it here too. Over the coming weeks I plan on posting some other favorites of mine that I have been collecting.

“In a way, forgiving is only for the brave. It is for those people who are willing to confront their pain, accept themselves as permanently changed, and make difficult choices. Countless individuals are satisfied to go on resenting and hating people who wrong them. They stew in their own inner poisons and even contaminate those around them. Forgivers, on the other hand, are not content to be stuck in a quagmire. They reject the possibility that the rest of their lives will be determined by the unjust and injurious acts of another person.”

Gordon Dalbey - Letter to the Editor, The Christian Century, 1991

Czechs are smart!

Czechs are smart


So are these missionaries!

Quiver Full

I came across this watching a morning news program. I'm really not sure what to think about it all.
Kevin and I go to a church where there are large families, and the church we went to in Bothell had very large families too. It's probably the one thing that makes me feel uncomfortable at church since it's just the two of us.



All my life the one dream that has always remained constant was to get married and have children. I was able to get married young and have enjoyed it and feel sucessful in my life as a wife. But my life as a childless mother is a bitter and painful sadness. Groups like this (even parts of my own family tree) make the sadness worst. If they are so blessed to have children, am I so cursed to live my life without children? And what of my desire to change that if only I could?

I came across a few links on Quiver full and because it's just a bit too hard to deal with right now I'm blogging it so I pick it up later.

Quiver Full Links page.
Quiver full, convicted housewife.
Quiver full homepage
Quiver full, about us.


The biggest issue I've come across in what I have looked at is the anti-birthcontrol stance.
I in no way am for abortions, once life has been created it shouldn't be stopped. I do however take birth control pills, and not to keep from having kids, but to regulate my hormones. I couldn't have kids even if I was off the pill. If I was to concieve I would more then likely loose the pregnancy as my odd hormone levels would not be conducive for a pregnancy to remain healthy. I've struggled with the idea of being on the pill, but knowing that it would lead to heartache and I'd miscarry this seems to be the best option for us, but I still stuggle if it is what the Lord wants, or is it better to miscarry so many times, or would surgery of some kind be best? These are the questions that keep me up at night.

Statement of Faith Paper - Valley Presbyterian Church

Crystal M. Baker
4/2/99 11:06 P.M.
Statement of Faith Paper
Valley Presbyterian Church


This isn’t a speech so I’ll start out by apologizing for exegeting my life. I’m a college student at a bible college so it is only natural that I would take something like a statement of faith and turn it into an essay of the testimony about how Christ has changed my life. And since I’m a college student I will try not to turn this into a lengthy discourse.

One of the definitions Webster gives to the word faith is, the belief and trust in and loyalty to God. I’ve known this for a long time. I learned in back in junior high to be exact. Knowing the definition of faith my mind was filled with thinking about what faith in God, as a Christian really meant.

There was a point in my life that everything seemed to be going wrong. It’s when everything goes wrong in everyone’s life. I call it my preteen years, others call it “When I was in Junior High…” Well, here is what happened in a nutshell. Junior High was awful for me. There was the issue of fitting in and “Do I fit in?” and “Will High School be scary?” but I also had things that a pre-teen doesn’t normally have to deal with.

I didn’t know how to deal with what was going on in my life. With all I was going through I remained the same person, at least outwardly. I didn’t change my attitude, I didn’t do drugs or act wired at school, I just took it all in. I became really depressed.

The only good thing I can think of about depression is that it makes a person think. For me it turned out to be good. We have always gone to church, it’s all I’ve ever known, but I didn’t understand why we did it for myself until my preteens. Since my depression was making me think I got to thinking about faith. Sure, I knew the reasons why every good little girl and boy goes to Sunday school and church and why we give offering. But I didn’t know why we needed a God. I knew all the bible stories of Moses and baby Jesus. I even knew that Jesus came, but why?

As I started to think about all the things I was taking into my mind I started to piece it all together. I started to think that it did make sense to have a savior, and for a simple reason. It seemed like anyone I talked to couldn’t really understand what I really wanted to talk with them about. It then hit me “Hey, God is God!” So I gave up trying to talk to people and I started to pray. Let me rephrase that though. I didn’t just give up talking to people, I quit trying to get people to understand me and turned to God in prayer because I knew he already understood me.

When I started praying I noticed a real change. I liked it, and everything didn’t seem to bother me as much. It finally made sense to have a savior. It made sense to say “Hey God, things aren’t working out.” and it felt really good to share my downfalls with God and still receive unconditional love. Knowing that God loved me unconditionally grew from studying about God in scripture and through all my praying. I started to see that I needed God. That’s when I really accepted Him. Soon I gave my life to Christ in church and was baptized! Then I continued to study, I needed to find out what I was supposed to do next. I wanted to know what God required. When I heard that we are supposed to tithe I started giving a tenth of my baby-sitting money and when I heard that promises were meant to be kept I started to cut back on what I said “I promise” to. I followed all the rules I could find, including the rule look for more rules; at least that was what my interpretation of studying the word was.

In High school I got too busy and too broke to continue to follow all the rules. I needed to save all of my baby-sitting money to buy my lunches and my homework cut into all the free time to read the bible. I continued to go to church and youth group though. I considered myself spiritually feed that way.

During one of my times at youth group the topic was about doing things for the Lord and having the right heart. It was exactly what I needed to hear. I started to realize that it didn’t matter to God if I gave him His share of the money and time if my heart wasn’t into it. Then I started giving up the baby-sitting jobs and went on to do more things around the church. I became more committed, and best of all my heart was in it!

Now that I’m in college I still search for God. I want to know who He is and what He wants changed in my life. After all when I accepted Christ into my life I gave him my life. I dedicated myself to His will. So far college has been a real time of reflection. A time of getting to really know what God wants changed in my life. Going to a Christian College the changes go at a fairly fast pace. God is doing some wonderful things in my life right now, and it is only because I believe that he can change me. I know that even if I work at changing my life for him my whole life, I’ll never achieve it on my own, but with Christ I will be made new in heaven. Praise God that I will be a new creation!

To sum up, or to give my statement of faith in only a couple of sentences, here I go. I know that Christ is my redeemer. He gave me the Holy Spirit to guide me in life and because I follow, I will get to be a new person in heaven and best of all I’ll get to see God!