I blog about; life with my loving husband, & our cats Siggy, and Maddie. Stuff in the news, my crafts, memes, photo posts & various other things that catch my fancy. I really like working at home, my husband appreciates my roll as housewife, and I find it my most rewarding job yet. We still hope to have children, though we still don't have any yet.

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Invisible Illness awareness week Meme - 30 Things About My Invisible Illness You May Not Know





The following is a meme I've filled out for Invisible Illness awareness week. Which is Sept. 14th - 20th. To find out more about this meme, or to fill it out for yourself click here.

30 Things About My Invisible Illness You May Not Know

1. The illness(es) I live with is: Rheumatoid arthritis, Fibromyalgia, & Poly Cystic Ovarian syndrome.

2. I was diagnosed with it in the year: PCOS - 1999, RA - 2005, FM - 2009

3. But I had symptoms since: 1994?

4. The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: How I pace myself, and what actually does get my attention and energy.

5. Most people assume: That I'm lazy, an over eater, and unorganized. None of these are true.

6. The hardest part about mornings are: Moving. I'm so stiff and sore and tired in the mornings. I rarely make plans until afternoon, and I miss many church services due to morning troubles.

7. My favorite medical TV show is: Scrubs. I'm not really into the drama based ones. Too much gore. But Scrubs is funny, and actually still teaches the viewer a thing or two about health too.

8. A gadget I couldn’t live without is: Bathroom handrails. And I'm angered by how many public places don't adequately clean the handrails in their handicapped stalls.

9. The hardest part about nights are: pain induced insomnia.

10. Each day I take 4-20 pills & vitamins. Depends on the level of pain and vitamin deficiency. (No comments, please) I also have a couple creams I use as needed, and an injection I take every other week.

11. Regarding alternative treatments I: Know a very small handful that are actually helpful. Like ginger & MSM cream for arthritis, and cinnamon for insulin resistance (as part of PCOS). But the vast majority of it all is snake oil and of no help.

12. If I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: Well, this is a tough one. PCOS is partly visible as it's caused me to gain a considerable amount of weight in my lifetime. And people are wicked and judgmental when they see an overweight person. On the other hand, I often think, if people could see the pain I'm in maybe I'd be believed more. So I really don't think I have an answer for this one. I think both are hard struggles to live with.

13. Regarding working and career: I don't think I'll be re-entering the work force. I'm struggling enough to keep home and need more support.

14. People would be surprised to know: That on my best of days I still feel the need to limit myself, because when I don't, I pay for it the next day.

15. The hardest thing to accept about my new reality has been: The cost of medications and the lack of income. I struggle with the idea of contesting a case to apply for SSI. I didn't work long enough before becoming ill to qualify for disability benefits. So all this is a very real strain on our income.

16. Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was: Participate in the Arthritis Foundation fundraiser walk! I didn't do the 3 mile plan I had hoped. But I still raised around $200 AND made it around the 1 mile course!

17. The commercials about my illness: Are really out of touch. The medications for RA help, but I've yet to be on one that fully gives me my life back as they seem to display. PCOS doesn't really have any commercials for meds anymore. For a while there was Vaniqua... I tried that - it did nothing for my facial hair growth & caused my skin to break out horribly.

18. Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is: LONG hikes. I still love to go on nature walks, but can't do anywhere near what I once could.

19. It was really hard to have to give up: The idea of carrying a child. It still breaks my heart. But my PCOS symptoms make this a very small possibility, even with the best of treatments. Plus. My husband and I agree, when it comes to growing our family, funds will be better spent for adoption than for infertility treatments that will most likely fail.

20. A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: Social networking. I'm here on FB and Blogger to meet and connect with others who have the same issues as me. It's been hard to find friends who have these same problems. So connecting on line has become a major support for me. I also really want to get into digital scrapbooking since working with my hands is hard. I've given up on a lot of physical crafts, but still enjoy being artistic.

21. If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: Shop the mall, walk on the beach and hike the full trail to Wallace falls.

22. My illness has taught me: To ask others for help (still teaching me that and kicking my butt doing it.) To rely on God for EVERYTHING! And to draw closer to Him!

23. Want to know a secret? One thing people say that gets under my skin is: "Try this!" or
"Have you tried this?" To be honest, I'm working every day to find ways to better my quality of life. Often things others have suggested have already been tried, and with failed results. It just brings up the whole frustration of hoping and failing all over again.

24. But I love it when people: Help me with my physical needs. A kind young man holding open the grocery store door means the world to me!

25. My favorite motto, scripture, quote that gets me through tough times is: 2 Cor. 4:7-18

But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. So death is at work in us, but life in you.

Since we have the same spirit of faith according to what has been written, "I believed, and so I spoke," we also believe, and so we also speak, knowing that he who raised the Lord Jesus will raise us also with Jesus and bring us with you into his presence. For it is all for your sake, so that as grace extends to more and more people it may increase thanksgiving, to the glory of God.

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.

26. When someone is diagnosed I’d like to tell them: Get connected. Don't let yourself feel like you are alone in this. Find others on-line or in your community through support groups, who have what you are dealing with. You'll learn loads for how to cope, what to expect, and you'll have support of others who know what you are going through when those around you don't.

27. Something that has surprised me about living with an illness is: How bad and apathetic some doctors can be. When you need to make appointments all the time, you start to really scrutinize the quality of your care.

28. The nicest thing someone did for me when I wasn’t feeling well was: Make meals & bring them to me, or buy food and bring it over. On my worst of days I miss meals because it's too hard to cook.

29. I’m involved with Invisible Illness Week because: Rest ministries has become a valuable ministry to me. I've been able to connect with so many others and share prayer requests and stories with others. There is HOPE; both in faith in Christ, and with fellowship with others. Even if that fellowship is over the computer.

30. The fact that you read this list makes me feel: Valued. You took the time to read what this all means to me and my life. Thank you! Thank you for caring for me as a human, and the needs, both physically and emotionally that I have as a result of the illnesses I have.

Find out more about National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week and the 5-day free virtual conference with 20 speakers Sept 14-18, 2009 at www.invisibleillness.com

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I blog about; life with my loving husband, & our cats Siggy, and Maddie. Stuff in the news, my crafts, memes, photo posts & various other things that catch my fancy. I really like working at home, my husband appreciates my roll as housewife, and I find it my most rewarding job yet. We still hope to have children, though we still don't have any yet.

Friday, September 12, 2008

My eyeballs, just because.

No reason other than I wanted to make eyeball art and I was willing to be my own model, photographers, and graphics artist. I like the greyscale & green hues pics, they shows how much I look like my dad. Mostly pics usually show my mom's side of the family in me.

These are done through the mirror in our small bathroom. Yes people, this is what boredom, depression, and insomnia mixed with a fleeting bit of creative inspiration looks like.




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I blog about; life with my loving husband, & our cats Siggy, and Maddie. Stuff in the news, my crafts, memes, photo posts & various other things that catch my fancy. I really like working at home, my husband appreciates my roll as housewife, and I find it my most rewarding job yet. We still hope to have children, though we still don't have any yet.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Tagged by Miss Bri.

My best friend's daughter has a blog, it's sweet. She loves all things elephant and her blog is dedicated to her sweet collection.

In a recent non-elephant post she tagged me for a simple little blog game....

Rules Once Tagged:
1) Link to the person who tagged you.
2) Post the rules on your blog (copy and paste 1-6).
3) Write 6 random things about yourself (see below).
4) Tag 6 people at the end of your post and link to them.
5) Let each person know they have been tagged and leave a comment on their blog.
6) Let the tagger (who tagged you) know when your post is up.

So here I go... 6 things about me;

1.


I've lived in 3 different states and I now live in the state I was born in. I love living in Washington. Colorado was nice, and I'm so happy I meet Kevin when I lived in California, but to me Washington state has always been home and it feels so good to be back.

2.


I used to want to be a marriage and family therapist. Still kind of do, but I don't want to be in school forever, and I really want Kevin and I to grow our family. I think about school every time the new school year starts. I wrote about that a couple posts back... I think the main reason though is my birthday also is this time of year, growing up everyone gave me school supplies for my birthday. In high school and college there were very few things I needed to get, I still have more pens and pencils then I know what to do with.

3.


I am half Czech, the other half is Euro-American-Native American mutt.

4.


I'm currently thinking about sleeping in the bathtub tonight to stay cool, summer is my least favorite season.

5.


My favorite color is cobalt blue. I've always loved that shade of blue which is both bright and dark. For our wedding I had both my dress and all my bridesmaids dresses made. I picked the fabric for them to wear and it was the perfect shade of my favorite blue. It was a long time though before my Matron of honor stopped picking on me about the name of the color. The name, typed on the end of the bolt of fabric said "Jezebel Blue". She thought it was sleazy to connect that with a wedding. Oh, well, at least my ladies looked lovely!

6.


In my back yard I have a pear tree, a cherry tree, and also raspberries, blackberries, and strawberries. There is something yummy from the backyard all summer long and I love it!

It's been too hot today for me to think straight, so I'm not sure just who I'd want to invite to play along. If you want to consider yourself tagged then have fun and try to stop back here to let me know where you posted.

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I blog about; life with my loving husband, & our cats Siggy, and Maddie. Stuff in the news, my crafts, memes, photo posts & various other things that catch my fancy. I really like working at home, my husband appreciates my roll as housewife, and I find it my most rewarding job yet. We still hope to have children, though we still don't have any yet.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Cryss needs

I think I did this one a while ago with my name, Crystal. But my best friend Mica recently did this on her blog, and I'm bored, so I thought I'd see if anything is interesting looking up my nick-name, Cryss...

So here it goes, I'm googling 'Cryss needs'... and writing up 13 of the results.

1. D.J. Cryss, you need to register. (Um sure, what do I need to register? I'm already registered to vote... and since when am I a D.J.?)


2. someone needs you; but it feels much better when you know that someone... (I couldn't find more info then this, going to the link wasn't working right, but the text I got from the search result certainly was interesting. I do know MANY of my dear friends right now have needs, and I'm praying for them, and wondering what else I can do to help.)


3. you will need to enable JavaScript and install Adobe ... (Kevin normally takes care of the computer updates, I'm sure these are there and updated.)

4. She understands team tactics well and will always be where her team needs her most. (How kind.)

5. i maybe need to take time out to listen ... (I always think that's worth it. I love to listen to people, I'd rather be a listening ear, than to have to talk much.)

6. When you absolutely need to get away from the shop, where do you like to go? (Hmm, I like to hang out with just a few dear friends, sometimes a sit down meal out to eat with loved one is all I really need. I also love road trips, and camping...)

7. I need to invite Lauren somewhere, but I don't know if she is planning anything... (Too bad I don't know who Lauren is... I guess.)

8. I have never seen you before but maybe its just me who needs to get out more (LOL! Too true about me! If it isn't church, grocery shopping or a doctors appointment I'm usually home!)

9. I'll do this all night if need be, but so far I get that same error .... (Oh, is Kevin migrating my blog to WordPress finally?)

10. All you need to have is Vista (NO! I'm perfectly happy with the Mac I have, I don't do windows!)

11. ...don't need to tell me twice. (usually true...)

12. I don't need to elaborate. (Apparently there is to be no comment on this particular result.)

13. Rashi and Cryss, the Nerd Queens of Random. Episode #2 - Lables? Who needs 'em? (Hmm, I think I'll follow this link and see what they have to say... Alas, yet another link that doesn't work.)

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I blog about; life with my loving husband, & our cats Siggy, and Maddie. Stuff in the news, my crafts, memes, photo posts & various other things that catch my fancy. I really like working at home, my husband appreciates my roll as housewife, and I find it my most rewarding job yet. We still hope to have children, though we still don't have any yet.

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

I saw red.



I saw this a couple days ago on Mica's blog and thought it would be fun to participate too. At first I kept coming across things that I didn't really feel compelled to capture for this photo hunt plus I'm unsure because my camera doesn't have flash, but then today lots of options hit me.

So, I may be a bit delayed for the start, but here are some of my I see red photos from around my house.

First up is one of the weirder ones I wasn't too sure about capturing. It's my sharps container. I have this to contain my used injection pens from injecting my arthritis medication.



This next one is another one of the ones I wasn't so sure about. But it ties in with a previous post so I thought I should fit it in. This is my progress so far on making myself a plastic bag, crocheted from cut up plastic shopping bags. Most of the bags I'm using are Target bags. So while the main color is white, there is a fair amount of red too.



Next are a couple from the kitchen... During my last thrifting trip I came across this great vintage set of stove top salt and pepper shakers. I can't actually use them because they're missing their corks, but that's easily replaced. I just love how they blend right in with my Moravian ceramics!



And here are my stars on the kitchen wall. The lighting here isn't the greatest, but the star on the left is all red, and then the one on top is patriotic.



Our dinner table is usually covered with my craft supply, and sure enough looking there I quickly came across many red items.



My collection of Czech dolls also have loads of red in their pretty costumes. Thank you grandma for adding to my collection yet again! It's becoming quite a collection! Last month when I was visiting she added a couple more to my collection! I love them! I love you grandma!



And last, but certainly not least is the BEAUTIFUL treasure box dolly that my dearest friend Mica gave me for Christmas. She put so much love and detail into this wonderful creation of hers, I love that I have this piece! Christmas may be over, but I keep this doll out year round because it comes from such a dear friend!



Well, this certainly is fun! I hope you enjoyed the red glimpses around my house today.

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I blog about; life with my loving husband, & our cats Siggy, and Maddie. Stuff in the news, my crafts, memes, photo posts & various other things that catch my fancy. I really like working at home, my husband appreciates my roll as housewife, and I find it my most rewarding job yet. We still hope to have children, though we still don't have any yet.

Sunday, June 01, 2008

Saturday Special

Over at "The Saturday Special" they weekly ask 4 questions. - "A Creative Meme ~ Answer 4 fun questions each week." So here are my answers for this weeks questions. I came across it Saturday morning, but just now got a chance to fill it out.


1. My home would be in the style of?

I'll answer this for the home I have, since I love my home, and don't have a "dream home" shadowing my thoughts of where I live.

The building itself is a modern ranch manufactured home. I'm just fine with it too, it's plenty of home for the two of us, even some kids someday, Lord willing. I'd like to get shutters on the sides of the front windows, and maybe someday hang my flower boxes in the windows. Though I've been advised against it because of rain, but we don't really get rain right on the building unless the wind is also really wild, so maybe we will put them up someday. I currently just have them sitting on the decks. One of the front deck, and the other on the back, they seem to be OK as just planters too, but since they can be mounted, I do think it'd be nice someday.

The decor inside tends to be Americana, European folk, and 50's retro. I like the way things are, I'd go for more 50's decor. I want a real 50's farmhouse kind of kitchen someday! Very soon, I should start painting my kitchen. We got the first few cans a few months back, after my kitchen fire, now we need to do the painting now that we can open the windows without having cold or rain come in. The colors are black, off white, and red. Hopefully this project will happen in a couple weekends.

2. My kind of furniture style is?

I'm pretty eclectic, there is no real classification of our collection of furniture. It'd be nice to someday have the pieces match better, but no big deal. Some of our pieces are modern or functional, others well, I don't know... we have a good deal of stuff from Ikea. Really a lot of what we own that we didn't get from Ikea is hand me downs, so there is no real coherent theme, it works, but I don't know how to describe it. I also don't really know what I'd want if I could just replace all my furniture.

3. My floors would be covered with?

I'd love bamboo hardwood floors someday! With really old, detailed throw rugs. The grey-blue carpeting we have works, but I hate the linoleum, I've always hated all linoleum. Real tile is so much nicer. When we lived in the condo the bathroom had tile and the kitchen had linoleum, and I always liked the tile section so much better, it didn't seem any harder to clean either, I actually found it easier. I'd love to rid my life of linoleum at some point and have only tile or hardwood depending on the room. Carpet still being OK for the bedrooms. For now I just need to come up with a way to keep the icky linoleum clean without breaking my back (remember, I have arthritis in my back, so it gets super painful, super quick.), which so far has felt impossible! The Swiffer wet seems to do OK for spot cleaning, but real cleaning not so much. I have a sponge mop, but it's so much work, and the last time I had a rag mop the stupid rags kept getting moldy because I couldn't keep them dry. I think soon I'm going to invest in a rag mop that can have the head removed and thrown into the dryer, anyone have any ideas on this matter? I know there is no easy way to clean floors, but I need something that isn't as hard of work because currently I do the floors and my back is a wreck for a week! I really could use some ideas here.

4. My landscaping would look like?

We live in the country, so I don't want an overly manicured lawn, it wouldn't look right.

We're currently hoping to fence things off the rest of the way, and we're thinking about a few bushes in the front yard. I'd love to build a brick wall around the base of the trees out front, but I think the Washington weed (blackberry bramble) has something else in mind, keeping it from being out of control is a nightmare, and I don't want to loose my trees just to get rid of the berry bramble. Plus I keep it in the back so it would probably creep back up front anyway.

The front flower bed is pretty much done and maintenance free (aside from weeding.) I've been thinking about laying down bark, but I'm afraid it would kill off or lessen the wildflowers. I love all the wildflowers we get - buttercups, bluebells, daisies, and some other purple flower I can't figure out. We also have dark pink rambling roses, maybe another rose bush would be nice. We also have a few different bulb flowers; purple iris, various daffodils and red tulips. It's such a shame that bulbs only flower for such a short time each year, but at least their blooming times are staggered, so we get to enjoy the various types all spring. Currently the iris' are taking their time to bloom. The neighbors across the street started about two weeks ago, so I'm guessing mine will be any-day now. Hers are on the side that get the evening sun, mine get the morning sun, so I think that's why mine take longer.

I also really want to make a few raised vegetable gardens. Currently I grow my veggies in a few very large pots (from our condo/apartment living days) but I know I'd yield larger crops if the roots had more space to roam. I have a pear tree and a cherry tree. Some more fruit trees would be nice. I don't have room for an orchard, but I can plant a few more trees. We also have a tiny lacy Japanese maple, it's Tony cats tree. It'd be nice to have another one, near our pond. We have a tiny pond (5 gallons maybe?) by our garden shed. The shed is cool because it matches the house. It's tall too, and has greenhouse windows in the top. But they're too high to use the shed as a greenhouse. Someday an actual greenhouse would be nice, but by the time I have the trees and veggie gardens I want, I'm not sure I'd have much room left for a very big greenhouse, but we'll see when that time comes. We've only been in this place 2 years now, so we're still working on making it look lived in. It'd be too expensive to do everything we'd like on our property all at once. We'd also like to enlarge our back patio, and put awnings over the front, side and back doors. Also we hope to have a carport on the side of the house, but we think we should get the awnings first.

So those are our home plans. What are yours? If you add this to your blog leave me a comment and I'll take a look and comment.

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I blog about; life with my loving husband, & our cats Siggy, and Maddie. Stuff in the news, my crafts, memes, photo posts & various other things that catch my fancy. I really like working at home, my husband appreciates my roll as housewife, and I find it my most rewarding job yet. We still hope to have children, though we still don't have any yet.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

5's

Anne tagged me for a meme post so here I go! (I secretly love these things, it's silly, but I enjoy them every time I'm tagged!)

SO here are the rules:

Each player answers the five questions about themselves.
At the end of the post, the player tags five more people, posts their names and then goes to their respective blogs where they must leave a comment letting them know that they have been tagged to play along.

What was I doing ten years ago?
1. Sever case of senioritis... yes, this year is my 10 year anniversary since my H.S. graduation.
2. Debating about leaving First Christian Church, Redwood City.
3. Only applying to one college and getting in. I was accepted to San Jose Christian College. I have no idea what I would have done, or where I would have gone had I not got in.
4. Scrap-booking like crazy. I had so much free time my senior year of HS, I think it was the last time I actually completed albums the years the photos were taken!
5. Went to Europe with my family and boyfriend. I kept begging him to propose to me on the Charles bridge in Prague (Yes, we had been talking marriage then, but it still wasn't formal planned yet.) Kevin had me convinced he had something else in mind, but when we were almost all the way across the bridge he got down to "tie his shoes" and proposed to me!

Five things currently on my to-do list
1. Clean every room of the house
2. Finish outstanding swaps I really should send already.
3. Buy prenatal vitamins
4. Pack for Kevin's business trip next week.
5. Make the aprons for Grandma that she requested.

Five snacks I enjoy
1. Taquitos
2. Nacho corn chips (not Dorito's so much.)
3. Corn chips with salsa!
4. Cheese
5. bananas, or fruit in general really.

Five things I would do if I was a billionaire
1. Give a bunch away to different charities / organizations / and missionaries I believe in, and family.
2. Buy Mica a vehicle.
3. Buy Kevin and I new clothes and shoes, and restock our kitchen... all the things we're doing without but still need. As well as
splurge on wish-list items, the Amazon list is crazy long since we just don't buy extras it just keeps growing.
4. Pay off credit debt, and the house. Maybe buy another property... YES! I want a cabin in Mount Index area!
5. Invest for retirement/ kids, etc.

Five of my bad habits
1. Hating the telephone so much I never call anyone.
2. Zoning out with the TV on.
3. Blogging/chatting on-line when I should be sleeping.
4. Signing up for swaps when I can't really afford the postage and shouldn't be signing up for swaps, so instead I use grocery money to pay for swaps.
5. Not eating until I'm beyond hungry because I just don't want to stand in the kitchen when my back hurts.

Five places I have lived
1. Tacoma, WA
2. Redwood City, CA
3. Thornton, CO
4. San Jose, CA
5. Bothell, WA

Five jobs that I have had
1. Baby sitter/house sitter/ dog sitter
2. Receptionist
3. Nanny (more responsibility then #1.)
4. Retails sales/key-holder/Tupperware consultant/Professional crafter.
5. WIFE

I still do Tupperware, selling crafts on Etsy, and my favorite roll, WIFE!

I tag:
Mica
Dana
Sondra
Trish.
Laura

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I blog about; life with my loving husband, & our cats Siggy, and Maddie. Stuff in the news, my crafts, memes, photo posts & various other things that catch my fancy. I really like working at home, my husband appreciates my roll as housewife, and I find it my most rewarding job yet. We still hope to have children, though we still don't have any yet.

Friday, February 08, 2008

Not social


I've always been a wall-flower. Always. I'm much more content to have a table in the back corner of a room with my back to the wall, feet growing roots in the floor, and watching the world interact in front of me. Am I shy? I don't really think so... I know I get shy in certain circumstances, but I've been in high school drama plays, and since elementary school all through college I've been in many choirs. I'm not afraid to be up front if I have to. But, I am perfectly content with staying holed up in my house, reading books, making crafts, and keeping house and letting days go by before I make contact. Hard to believe considering my blogging sometimes, but writing has always been very easy for me. What has never been easy is picking up the phone. PERIOD. If we have business to take care of I become a baby and make Kevin do it as soon as he gets home. And my poor dear friends never get phone calls from me. I'm fine to talk on the phone with someone when they call, but I always see making a phone call as an intrusion. Maybe it stems from a hate of telamarketers, or having to be quiet back in the days when my dad worked nights, I don't know. But I think the biggest thing to me is that you can't read the other persons body language. I put so much into that. It's a part of who I am as a wall-flower. I just enjoy watching people so much, as much as others love the art of conversation. Body language speaks volumes. And when you're on the phone it's almost like during that conversation you're blind, you don't get to see body language.

On Sunday two friends both asked me independently why I never call, I just really don't have any answer beyond this. I feel like a horrible friend, I love them both dearly. I guess this is just one of my flaws. I own it, but I know it keeps me from others, even ones I love dearly. I want to change that, but it's a work in progress. I've never lived in one place long enough to know what a friendship really can hold. I hope I'm changing that. I hope I'm putting down roots here, not going to move this time, will keep friends near me and grow together as dear friends over the years. One thing though is everything around here (this house) is moving in s...l...o....w... m..o...t..i...o...n... We still have to put away Christmas. I'm so embarrassed to admit that. I have the tree down, and most of the decorations, but they still need to go back in their boxes in the shed. I keep seeing on so many blogs all the wonderful spring cleaning and craft room organizing others are doing and I wonder if I get started now, would I be ready to post my pictures in a year? I admit, I'm feeling pretty down on myself these days. I don't really know why other than I'm fed up with my current medical care and looking for new doctors and feeling like that process isn't happening fast enough considering my constant pain, and my lack of normal sleep schedule and so on.

I've even seen myself slow down on blogging and talking with friends on MySpace. I've spent times where it's all I do, but these days opening blogs and profiles is just something I don't always feel like doing. Main thing is that s...l...o....w... m..o...t..i...o...n... issue. I feel like so many others are able to have cool lives, raise and teach kids, and for me it's still all just a dream. I'm 28, I'm still young, but I do feel my clock ticking too. This sucks. So I close up, I stop writing, don't call, don't post, I just sit with a book and ignore life, hoping someday something can change, but not knowing how to make it change now.

:: Deep breath :: I'm not looking for pity or anything. Just trying to explain why so many posts have been just a picture, or a silly quiz. I've been bummed about my lack of comments lately, but what have I done recently to get any comments here, I mean really. What do I expect people to respond to?

Please pray with me about these things. I want to be who my friends need me to be, I want to be a mother, I want to be the wife my husband needs me to be. And I want to hold on to the joy and hope I do have in Christ that I am easy to ignore or forget.

So from this humble wall-flower I ask a few things. Please be patient with me... If I've ever told you I love you, that does mean I love you... If I'm quite, it rarely means I'm mad at you or anyone, and if I am it's more likely that I'm mad at me and not you... I'm trying to grow, through Christ I can be the person I know others need me to be, and with glory to and for Him.

I hope everyone is doing well, I'm sorry I've become so withdrawn lately. I've just been thinking about so much. I hope everyone has a wonderful Valentine's day next week. I'm sure I'll post again before then, but with a holiday of love coming up I just wanted to let my dear friends know I love them.

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I blog about; life with my loving husband, & our cats Siggy, and Maddie. Stuff in the news, my crafts, memes, photo posts & various other things that catch my fancy. I really like working at home, my husband appreciates my roll as housewife, and I find it my most rewarding job yet. We still hope to have children, though we still don't have any yet.

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Me!

Age I will be on my next birthday:


Years married:
ALMOST


Faith:


Favorite design:


A place I want to visit:


One of my favorite places to visit is...:


Favorite Holiday:


Favorite object:


Favorite flower:


Favorite season:


Favorite Vehicle:


Celebrity crush(s):
First:




Current:








Favorite food:






Favorite animal(s):








...and yes, I've thought have having that be Siggy's next costume!

Favorite color


Where I was born:


A favorite childhood memory:






Where I live:


Name of pet:


Name of love:


My name:


Middle name:


Last name:


Worst habit:


First job:


Current job:


Dream Job:


Best feature:


Favorite shoes:


Favorite thing to wear:


Something I collect:


Hobbies:






Favorite music:


Favorite drink:




Favorite video game:

Of all time:


Current:


Favorite kitchen appliance:


Favorite movie:


Favorite Era:


Something I can't relate to:


Something I can relate to:

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