sicky fibro flare

I'm still dealing with a fibromyalgia flare from doing a bunch of housework on Saturday, so I'm still giving myself grace in posting daily. My hands have an aching burning sensation with this flare, so typing for very long is uncomfortable. I had hoped to write on the topic of chronic grief today, but will have to move that over to one of the other free posts. It is a fascinating topic though, and I encourage anyone who is down because of chronic illness to look into chronic grief as it may help you understand better your personal stresses and give you a better perspective on how to talk with others about what you are dealing with, and how to gain the support we all need.

Flubbed already, so here's a quick free-post.

So the time is 1:06 am wednesday morning and I realized I didn't log on to write soon enough for Tuesday. So lets pretend this is Tuesday's post. I was also planning on making this post one of my more serious posts, 'Post abortion secondary infertility'. However I'm still working on that article and it isn't quite ready. Considering this isn't completely scripted out and I was thinking of having a free post for Wednesday I'll post free post right now for Tuesday and hopefully finish the other post later in the day for Wednesday.

'Today' (Tuesday) I saw a pulmonary specialist. I've been dealing with bad pain induced insomnia which keeps me from readily falling asleep and staying asleep. Fibromyalgia is one of the things to blame, but with talking to the doctor (and I knew this ahead of time too) I'm dealing with some additional sleep disturbances. So I'll be having a sleep study soon to find out more information about what's going on. I actually am really looking forward to this as I believe it'll give both the doctors and myself more information that'll better equip us as to how to help me achieve more restorative sleep, which really, hopefully will help with my pain management and fatigue.

I'm thankful that I have such a great rheumatologist. It could be thought that he's just trying to pass me on to other specialists (since he also made sure I saw again an endocrinologist to treat my PCOS) but personally I think it's important for a doctor to know what they know well, and know who to refer to to help with the things they don't have as their specialty. I think too, this will give my rheumatologist more information as the test results will come back to him as well. In all I feel like my medical team is shaping up and while it will always be work to balance things and find my ideal level of functioning with disability, I do think those now involved have my genuine care in mind.

Another voice of chronic pain

Today I'm sitting in my PJ's at the computer yet again. I'm mad at my weak body because I was trying to make plans with a friend to go down to Olympia for a political protest. My body has other plans. Apparently sleep is ruling my life again, get it while I can, and need lots of it.

I follow a blog of another person with a different type of chronic pain and illness, but who voices many of the same frustrations that are universal for all of us who deal with this.

The post from yesterday is something I thought I'd share. You can read it all here. But what I thought was particularly important were the last few lines. Having a diagnosis and plan of medical attack to treat it is much more important to patients than some medical professionals may realize.

"I can still feel the relief deep within my soul. It was then that I finally accepted for the most part my sickness. I still have my moments of depression, and anger, but I’ve learned to look for the positive things in my life. A simple smile and puppy dog kisses are worth a million dollars to me. You never really appreciate the small things until you have your life turned upside down from a chronic illness. I have said to a lot of people appreciate your health because you never know when the rug of health will be pulled out from underneath your feet."

A couple months ago I wrote in my facebook about how frustrated I was that I still don't have a formal diagnosis after over three years of seeing doctors for what I deal with. I'm diagnosed with RA, but AS is still only speculated, not diagnosed (even though there are mounds of tests and symptom journals to prove this.) When I wrote about this a good friend rightfully replied that going this long without an answer is just insane, if it was something life threatening their patient would be dead! He's so right, and I am thankful that this is "just an auto-immune disorder" and not something life threatening, but even still. Having a diagnosis does make a huge difference. This friend is currently studying to be an EMT. I'm very proud of him for this as I know at least one more person getting into the medical field will have the right frame of mind when it comes to helping people.

I anxiously await next friday. That's when I go back to my nurse to hear the results of my recent MRI. I'm very interested in knowing the results as something from it prompted the Rheumatology clinic to reschedule my follow-up appointment 3 weeks sooner that what had been originally planned. I'm not really fearing that it's going to show anything scary. Mostly I'm assuming that my scans do in-fact show spinal fusion and that this is why my back pain has been as severe as it has been lately.

Well, I really do hope that others will read the post I'm referring to in this one. The only thing I'd add to my own version of this is that my faith is of great importance to me. Without it I wouldn't see much reason in living day in and day out through this. I want others to know that with Christ I have hope, and others with chronic pain and illness can have hope too. It can feel like our symptoms rule us sometimes. But with each day things can improve just as much as they can stay the same.

Keeping my hope in Christ, while livin' in my PJ's.
Cryss

Of pot roast and pot pies.

Living with chronic illness means that there are a lot of times when we eat prepared meals. It's not something I'm proud of, but sometimes I need a little help from the grocery store, the nights I'm not well enough to stand in the kitchen and cook.

I always make way more than we need each time I do cook so we can have leftovers, and I try to make things we won't get tired of or that I could quickly adapt into something else later.

Anyway, so last night, the highlight of my so unproductive week long flair up, was making pot roast. It wasn't the greatest, and I certainly noted a few things to do different next time. Didn't matter to the Hubster... He devoured his entire portion and praised me for it most of the evening. Even willing to have it as seconds tonight. So tonight I made us pot-pies to go with our pot roast. By 'make' I mean I thawed out and baked some brand name pre-made ones. Now, mind you, we've had these before, but normally as a snack, not eating them with something else. As we ate, we wondered how we ever ate these before! What was it that was in these that made them so completely bland, and the roast I made so flavorful. It felt like a magic trick of the taste-buds. I got to thinking, hey, I'm not that bad of a cook. Really I know I'm not, but I'm trying to remain humble.

Needless to say, I'm thinking about buying more freezer containers and making even more meals ahead on my good days, this is just pathetic. It was strange too to recall times when these little pot-pies have tasted so good and how disappointing they were tonight. It was also quite shocking to see that this particular brand has now taken to supplementing the meat with soy... no wonder the meat tasted gross and was so un-naturally soft. We agreed that Marie Calendar's is probably the only pot pies we like anymore... and even still, we probably should have me make home-made stuff ahead of time, as much as possible from now on.

This is an honor and a frustration though. I pride myself in becoming as best of a cook as I possibly can, so I'm always happy when I hear my food does please and satisfy, but as someone who most days doesn't have the energy I need to get it all done this also becomes quite a chore. I want to make us the food that is best for us, but if I'm too sick to sit or stand at the stove what do I do? And yes, I sit... I've bought a few different bar stools at different heights and it's a definite help with a lot of meals. Realistically though this isn't always a help, and I need something more.

Recently I've made some friends on line who also have Ankylosing Spondylitis and I was talking with one of them on-line last night, and she convinced me I need to invest in a walker. She was saying it's the best things she's done for herself. Believe me, it's something I've seriously considered quite a bit this last year. If it's something that helps keep me going on the bad days than that's a good thing, I think. There is now said walker on my amazon.com wish-list.

One of the hardest parts about chronic pain is that there are bad days, worst than bad days, and OK days too. And a lot of times people look at someone with a chronic pain illness and think well, their good days are how they are, and they just have to push harder on the bad days, and really that you've just given up. First of all, that outlook causes emotional pain. Daily life is such an ordeal with these illnesses, I know all my friends with chronic pain illness, and myself included, would give darn near anything to feel as strong and healthy as we once did. It does us no good to simply act as if we're just lacking a needed push. It makes us feel misunderstood, pained, and frustrated. Believe you me, if this was a matter of willpower, it'd be a different story.

The blessings of networking with others on-line & sharing these frustrations is that as we write, we share ways of sharing, giving perspective, and maybe, hopefully a new angle to share with others how our life is different.

I want my healthy friends and family to read this post by a fellow A.S. sufferer because as I read it I kept thinking that what she was writing was a cliff-notes version of my blog, and maybe hearing her share her words could give you better insight into my life. Yes, it's from her perspective of this disease, but I didn't read anything that isn't what I'd say, or have said.

This road is tough, and I need love and support from those around me as a result.

I need to honestly say that I'd love and appreciate meals brought over, this time of year especially. Don't break your bank, but home made, as opposed to pre-made is so much better, and I hate when we settle. I don't want to be a burden on anyone's grocery budget though.

Well, I need to start heading to bed. I've been sleeping about 11 hours on average lately, and I have women's fellowship tomorrow and don't want to miss it. At this rate I'm looking at taking a shower after I log off, crawling into bed, and when I roll out of bed tomorrow head on out to the meeting. It's at 1:00 PM. Now before you say, "Oh, I wish I could sleep like that!" Please know this is no luxury! I'm not getting rest at all these days, and much of that time is spent laying in bed praying the pain will go away enough to sleep well, only to dream about the pain, and wake up not rested. I hope tomorrow will be better, but I have to look at realistically how this week has been so far.

Good night blog friends, and blog readers. For now, I try to sleep.

Up all night swollen

Yup, my hands are swollen. I had to ice my hands after cooking dinner tonight. Pretty sad, but hey, that's arthritis. And I can't move my back hardly at all right now. And my neck has been stiff for days. I guess my neck was the first to feel the cool rainy weather that has rolled in. Don't get me wrong. I am completely happy that rainy days are back, I have plenty of arthritic days all summer too, the heat fatigue can be unbearable! During the day I thought I felt pretty good, and I had the mental energy to get some stuff done, but when it came down to it I was back to standing for only about half an hour before my back pain was just feeling like murder.

Hands are still swollen, and my knees are a bit too, I'm guessing my shoulder/back of neck may be as well, but I can't see behind me. LOL! I just feel swollen. Ladies, I think you'd know what I mean, that feeling during that time of the month, well, I feel it elsewhere in my muscles and joints.

I'm not complaining, just giving a progress report... and a prayer request that this storm that's looking to dump on us all week doesn't stick around or bring in another on the 11th. I'm really looking forward to the Arthritis Foundation's fundraiser walk, but I'm guessing most all of us will be suffering if it's weather like it is right now in a little over a week.

Wow, time is flying by quick! It seems like just a couple days ago I started fundraising, and here it is 8 days before the event and I've completely raised my goal twice, almost three times over, and I've been helping Kevin do his fundraising too! He still needs a few more sponsors if you are still thinking of helping.

So because I'm in too much physical discomfort to sleep I decided to see if accuweather agrees that I should be in this much pain... here is what the site showed me for the current arthritis index... yet again proof that my symptoms are so closely tied to the cycles of weather. So my plan now is to take some Tylenol PM to try to sleep, because if I don't get it now, it looks like it'll be even harder Friday night.

Pain causing pain - considering Cymbalta.

Right now I'm dealing with my pain (lack of management) causing my depression to spiral deeper and the two keep feeding off of each other. On Sunday I couldn't get out of bed. My sleep has been completely disrupted, getting a few hours here and there, any time day or night, and feeling like a zombie the rest of the time. I will make an appointment with my Rheumatologist once I can get past how foggy I am right now. I'm going to ask if I need to add Cymbalta to my medications since I haven't been able to take Prozac in a while and not medicating my depression is starting to take it's toll on me again. The last time I was treating it was last summer while Tony cat was sick and I continued a couple months after he passed away, but eventually the dizzy spells and migraines from it became too much so I just stopped. I know I shouldn't have, that I should have asked a doc to switch me, but I'm so sick of appointments I've just been avoiding some because I feel like going to appointments would become a full time job right now if I did, I'm already out of the house for physical therapy twice a week right now, and that's taxing.

Anyway, from what I keep reading, Cymbalta is the anti-depressive of choice for those with chronic physical pain issues and depression too.

The majority of my pain is in my back these days. I think physical therapy is working well for my hips, but that my back is either getting worse or is more noticeable with the hips not being as much of an issue. The back pain is keeping me from sleep. I feel like someone kicked me in the back and now it's all achey and stiff. Or like I have a lead pipe around my spine. I'm suffering limited balance and limited range of motion and I'm find myself leaning on counters and using my cane more even though my hips are a bit better. (Bursitis anyway, still dealing with Osteoarthritis and labral tears there, that only changes with surgery.)

Because this makes sleeping impossible, the lack of reparative rest makes my head foggy, pain more intense, and depression worst. The following is something I found because I was wondering what, if any, information might be out there in regards to A.S./R.A. and depression. I found that, like a lot of other forms of depression women are effected more than men. Kind of interesting that they could monitor that considering males are diagnosed with A.S. more than women, but according to the Spondylitis Association of America those statistics are changing.

Here is what I read;

Wiley InterScience

Depression has been established as a common reaction to rheumatoid arthritis but has rarely been investigated among people with other forms of arthritis. The present study examined the prevalence and determinants of depressive symptoms in people with ankylosing spondylitis, focusing on gender differences and set in the context of widely held medical views concerning the psychosocial nature of ankylosing spondylitis patients. Results showed that approximately one third of the ankylosing spondylitis patients reported a high level of depressive symptoms and that women reported more depression than men. No evidence was found to support the stereotype of the typical ankylosing spondylitis patient as being less depressed than people with other forms of arthritis. Pain was found to be a major determinant of depression for women, but was of lesser importance for men.

Depression in Women - Spondylitis Association of America;

People with chronic diseases are more prone to develop major depression. In fact, a British study showed that 37% of people with spondylitis suffer at least one bout of depression during a lifetime. Fortunately, more than 80 percent of people with depression can be treated successfully with medication, psychotherapy or a combination of both.

Women experience depression at roughly twice the rate of men, although it is an illness that affects both sexes. Contrary to popular belief, depression is not a "normal part of being a woman" nor is it a "female weakness". Researchers continue to explore how issues unique to women may contribute to the increased rate of depression. Such issues include reproductive, hormonal, genetic or other biological factors; abuse and oppression; interpersonal factors; and certain psychological and personality characteristics.

About one in every eight women can expect to develop clinical depression during their lifetime. Depression occurs most frequently in women aged 25 to 44 (Note: when a women is most likely to begin feeling the symptoms of spondylitis), and depression in women is misdiagnosed approximately 30 to 50 percent of the time.

So all this being said, I'm trying to get out of my fog. Finish up my physical therapy in the next couple weeks, and make an appointment with my Rheumatologist to find out what my next step is with physical therapy, and to see about adding Cymbalta. Most likely I'll need a new script for physical therapy to this time work on my back. I also need to remember to get a new referral for an orthopedic surgeon. I had one in my purse, but I took it out when we went to California because I didn't want to loose it, and here I've gone and lost it! I've looked all over and just haven't been able to find it! A lot feels chaotic these days. So disorganized and frustrating. I'm hoping things will get better soon though.

I'm really just making this post to remind myself of all these things, to keep track of the information I've found and to remind me to share it at my next appointment. I'll be OK, I've pulled out of issues like this before.

More AS facts that are probably just for me.

So I was poking around on about.com regarding muscle twitches and spasms. I slept super hard this morning and now have a knot the size of a mandarin orange in my right side (the side I slept on). I'm sure this is more of my auto-immune stuff, so I was poking around and found that About has an Ankylosing Spondylitis screening quiz. I decided to take it, and here are my results...



Now, because of my research on AS I know there were a couple things that I checked contrary that knocked down my score, but doesn't mean I don't have it. Like one of the questions was am I male or female, and because I'm female it knocked the rating down, but the reasoning there is because men are affected more than women by a ratio in excess of 2:1
And the other one that knocked my score down was that I don't have lots of eye inflammation or bowl issues. But those two are only a fraction of AS patients. Not all with AS have those, and for many it's an issue that arises as the disease continues untreated. (From what I understand in all I've read.) So just because those things aren't issues I deal with doesn't mean that AS isn't the right diagnosis. What all this does mean is statistically it would seem that a diagnosis of AS is appropriate. That treating my symptoms as such makes sense (I guess I'll crack open my Tai Chi DVD...) and that I should probably make sure my Orthopedist and physical therapists understand this issue about me.

I find the internet a real blessing. It gives me tools and resources to seek and bring questions and test results with me when I do go to my doctor visits. I've said it before and I still think it's true, that AS actually is a relief of a diagnosis to me because if my spine does fuse someday, yes my mobility will suffer, but my actual pain will greatly decrease, and that would be such a huge blessing.

I really hope that when I make posts like this one that it doesn't come off as complaining, but as informing. I know I've had this for years. It was debilitating when I worked retail, and to know now ways to rest and stretch and exercise properly has made my life so much better. Before I was at such a loss. So I share these things hopefully to raise awareness. I mean before I started really piecing this all together I had no idea that there was a type of arthritis like this. Sometimes it makes me feel like it all makes sense now, that a lot of my pain issues were not things I did to myself to cause them, but things I just didn't know because I didn't know what I was dealing with something that not everyone knows about. So I feel it important to let others know what I'm dealing with, to give validity to my disability and to let others know what to look for if they're dealing with such things as well.

So that's all for now I guess. This last week was rough sleep wise, so I never was really with it enough to make my phone calls for my appointments. I must be done Monday. I'm pretty sure I'll be able to, my sleeping is starting to even back out to 8 hours per night, or morning.

I'm still not certain if my injections are helping my AS symptoms or not, but they are helping my RA symptoms, I've actually been writing recipe cards by hand and while I have to take lots of breaks at least it's legible, so I'm happy.

Back pain haiku

I've been productive today, but still in loads of pain. I'm looking for an orthopedic doctor, as well as physical therapist. Anyway, I thought maybe some creativity would put some humor to what I'm dealing with so here is my silly haiku, I don't think it's very great, but it was fun to work on. An outlet.

My Back Pain Haiku

Grit teeth, cringe, back pain
it never ends, always there
raw pain, kills my mind

So, what do you think? I'm a silly-head, huh!?

Rest Ministries Chronic Illness Video

This is a broken, and fallen world. Because of that it's no wonder this world is so full of pain in so many ways. Regardless of my faith, my genes, lab results, and symptoms say I will and do deal with chronic pain. So, not using faith as a crutch, but as a frame of reference for what is ultimately true, I hope that a light can shine through me and my suffering. I hope God can use me to help others see that yes, this world is painful, but that's why I want Him to give hope to me and through me. Someday this world will end, and so will my suffering. Right now it seems like a long ways off, but when that day comes, and all time after, it will then seem like a fraction of a second. I have to believe this to be true.

If I focused my prayers on wishing this all away I'd miss the mark, there is something greater than this world. And that message needs to be said. This suffering is only as temporary as this life, so why not live my life the best I can, put my hope in Christ and trust that when Kingdom Comes, I'll have a new life, with a new hope and a higher purpose.

As someone who lives day in and day out with chronic pain and illness I know all too well the loneliness this produces, this place is a refuge and a support. I truly see God shine through this site.

Watch the video to learn more about the site, and to anyone else with chronic pain, illness, or invisible illness, I really recommend this site.

Rest Ministries is a place that is a support and comfort to me.

IN other news, I'll have my MRI scans done at 3:30 on Wednesday.

I bought a cane today.

So I woke this morning in agony. I had yet another "charlie horse" in my leg. Kevin had to kneed it to relax and even after that I ended up staying in bed in a half alseep half awake zombie mode. I didn't make it to church. Later when Kevin came home we went out together to get some stuff from the store and I was having such a hard time getting around that I bought a cane. I'm 27 and have days were I need a cane, fabulous! I'm not happy. Basically I've been taking one medication that I'm supposed to stop taking by taking less and less of it, but the more I do that, the more all my issues seem to keep creaping back up. I may just have to go back to the doctor again before my next appointment and just say, "See, this isn't working." I will admit I hardly ever take my prescription pain pills, just full strength asprin about once a day, but the pain isn't the issue as much as the mobility. It's really bad days like today that make me fear that when we do go to try and adopt that they'll say I don't pass or something like that. I can get around fine, I just have to make adjustments sometimes. And I haven't had a day this bad in months. Maybe I'm just worried about too much, but I feel like my body in persecuting me and I really don't want anything else bad to happen in any other way, even if it's far off. Which really doesn't make sense, but pain causes depression, and then a lot of things don't make sense.

What is going on with me!?

Health issues. Basically the doctor doesn't know what's wrong with me, just that something isn't right. Yay me! I hate it. So I've spent all day sleeping or serching my symptoms on-line to see if I can't figure things out. So far Arthritis, Fibromyalgia or Multiple Sclerosis seem to be possibilities. Lots of excessive sleeping, muscle weakness, cramps, spasims, etc. No fun.
I meet with a Rhumotologist next week, and I've also been refered to an endocrinologist to make sure it isn't more to do with my PCOS (though nothing I've ever read would point to this from that.) Yay me and more doctor visits, have I mentioned that now that I live in the country it takes forever to drive anywhere? At least yesterday I got more allergy meds and my cough has seemed to get better (or I should say is less/ near nothing anymore.) Apparently what triggered all this is that my blood protein levels were high, several points higher then the normal range. Which had him asking me how my muscle feel and such. I've always had muscle issues and was always told I didn't do enough, needed to exercize more and that it was just part of female issues. But I lift weights, and some days those weights seem much heavier then otherdays even if it was just normal days before.
It's frustrating because, up until now pretty much any symptom I've ever dealt with has easily fallen into two catagories, allergies or PCOS. Which meant I am basically healthy, just have a couple issues I need to keep track of. Now, who knows what all this is about. I'm sure eventually it'll be figured out, but in the mean time I'm kind of bugging out. I hate having low energy, especially when it's sunny and nice out, and there is so much unpacking to do here (I haven't really done much.) I'll just be really glad to know what this is. I'm kinda rooting for arthritis as strange as that seems because all the women in my mom's side of the family have/had it so it's just a matter of time for me, if this is that, then maybe I won't have as much pain as some of the other women in my family by catching it sooner. But I have symptoms that seem to be other things too, so there is no real way of knowing yet. I hate that.

So again I and my latest doctor are again completely in the dark as to what is going on with me. I've always been one to need lots of extra sleep when I get sick and I have days were I just randomly am weaker then I was the day before. I love lifting weights and just doing all the physical stuff around the house. But lately my muscles in my rib cage have been hurting more and more. And I've always got leg and arm cramps when I'd have my period, and while that's still true it's becoming more often and now at anytime. I tend to get the rib cramps with activity and the leg cramps with no activity, like I've been sleeping for several hours and wake up crying from a charlie horse!

My doctor has been pretty on top of getting blood work done on me and keeping an eye on it all. I was surprised when his office called me and said the doctor wanted to go over my labs because my cholesterol had gone up. They made a mistake. When I came in he made the correction that it wasn't the cholesterol he's concerned about, but my blood protein levels where are higher then they were before and also higher then normal averages. I've not thought too much about my muscle pains because in the past doctors have just told me to take Tylenol, try to exercise more and that I just needed to give it time because it's my hormones. But this time he asked me, well do you have muscle pain and I described the cramping I get and he seems to think there's a connection. He asked about family history of arthritis and I mentioned that my mom's side of the family has it in all the women. Yay me, I'm next. The most likely thing is that the family history is whats telling and that I'm developing something along those lines. So her I am having my 27th birthday tommorow and next week I'm meeting with a Rhumotologist!

I had to try and see if there is any correlation between PCOS and the high blood protein count and for most women with PCOS it seems like it's typically that it's a low count, so I have this going in the opposite direction. I don't know that it discounts it as being a part of the PCOS or not, but both I and my doctor haven't seen any correlations and he couldn't see any of my meds as being what caused it either. He was tempted to have me go off the Metphormine for a while, just in case, but instead made me a referall to an endocrinologist and is leaving the choice in their hands. I see the Endocrinologist next week as well.

While I was in the office I didn't think of it, and I'm an idiot for having this great doctor for 8 months now and not getting my CA records transfered. But I remember my regular M.D. in CA saying my blood protein was on the high end, and that she contributed that to why it takes me longer to get over colds and why it's harder for me to fight infections, I get sinus infections two or three times a year! So here it seems like another set of symptoms are all coming together to tell me and my doctor that I have another something, but for now we're not sure what... Will I start having arthritist or fibromyalgia? Who knows, all I know is that for once it seems like I'm dealing with something other then just PCOS. It was kind of comforting to know that all my symptoms lumped together for the most part and could all be treated under that umbrella. Now I have to think about yet another thing and I'm really confussed as to what it all means now.

Last night I slept 10 hours. That's been my norm lately, where typically I can get by with the normal 7-8. I woke up feeling like I had to force myself out of bed because I knew I was sleeping much longer then normal. I'd wake up enough to look at the clock, but the second I'd blink I was back to dreaming sleep. Not just dozing for a few more minutes. Now that I'm up I feel a lot of pain in my ribs and back and my legs feel like a baby deer. And yet I had moderate activity yesterday, nothing strenuous, but not couch potatoe either, and I had more then enough hours of sleep. But I guess what it comes down to is the sleep wasn't restful because of pain in my sleep. If the pain doesn't get better by bedtime I think I might take some Tylenol PM to see if I don't have a better morning tomorrow. As it is now, I had hoped to do gardening since it's a cooler day, but I think all I'll be able to handle is sitting at the computer or TV. And I don't like that.

I don't mean to complain. And mostly I just wanted to update this with all my curiosities. I know it's not really PCOS related, but I'm not sure where else to put it. I've always dumped my health stuff here, and it's always been PCOS.

Hallelujah!

Praise the Lord! Finally after about a week of laying around and peeing and squirming and popping pain pills I'm feeling better.
I spent so much time on-line reading countless sites furthering my belief that what I dealt with was a ruptured cyst. Had I not had leftover pills from my wisdom tooth extractions I probably would have paid the big bucks to go to the E.R. without health insurance. Fortunately we finally got all the papers in order to get our insurance. As soon as we get our cards I'm off to the medical center in hopes of useful referrals.

Ruptured Cyst?

From what I can tell on multiple sites it seems like what I'm dealing with is a ruptured cyst. I've got a need to urinate type pressure but not bladder infection. The dull but constant (AND ANNOYING!) pain or cramps is in a very specific place near my left ovary and moving around seems to make it worse. Laying still with hot packs, drinking lots of water and going to the bathroom more then I've ever thought was possible all seems to do something. I'm pretty certain it isn't something like kidney stones or appendicitis because of the very specific location and the pain doesn't seem sharp or stabbing, and I don't have any fever. I have had some lower back pain, but it's at the base of my hips and not higher up near the kidneys. It seems to radiate from the left ovary towards the back and into my thigh a little bit, not the other way around. There is a bit of swelling and I've had traces of spotting for a few days now. 5 days ago I took an ovulation test (probably too late) and came up negative. After the worst of the pain from the rupture (it did get to be kind of alarming at one point because laughing, breathing deep, or moving around hurt! BAD!) I did a pregnancy test, also negative to make sure it wasn't a ruptured ectopic pregnancy, but considering my tendency to have annovulation I figured I wasn't going to have any results say positive anyway.
I'm drinking lots of juice, eating pineapple, drinking TONS of water (I already drink lots, now it seems like a constant stream!) and having lots of salty foods. I was a bit concerned about the salty cravings, but most sites seem to point to salt craving as being a way the body protects from infection during stress and I think with the amount of liquids I'm drinking I'm doing O.K. Lots of chicken, chicken soup and (bad I know) potato chips. But I'm eating in very small portions and not very much. I've really lot my appetite with this. If I eat to much the OUCH!
I've been using menstrual relief pills paired with half a dose of tylenol during the day and some heavier stuff leftover from my wisdom teeth extractions for bed. Seems to work well, except for the lack of sleep! I wake up about every 2 hours to go pee! I'd love to sleep straight 8 hours again! It's been a while because last week I had bad insomnia from a cold I was dealing with! Seems like issues happen all at once with me!
I wish I knew how long recovery tends to be. Everything I read just mentioned pain meds and rest. I added the water to address the urgency to pee and to avoid dehydration and/or shock. I'm hoping to recovery quick because Thanksgiving is this week, but who knows. I'm just going to take it easy until then. It's all I can really handle right now anyway!